Three: Danu, the Notpig, and Craigslist

Danu, the Notpig, and Craigslist

In a small, serene living room, two pet birds, perched conspicuously near an Oinks Super Pigfie, converse thoughtfully.
Sjöström: Did we get fed this morning?
Dreyer: Nope. She's been bad about feeding us ever since the plastic pig came. She's so busy brushing its hair that she forgets us.
Sjöström: Well, nuts.

It's a quiet day, the kind of day that's good for curling up with a book. Nothing stirs.

But...what's that? Is it the doorbell?

What's this? A shiny silver box, brought triumphantly in by our heroine.

It bears the legend "Notpig."

Our heroine looks inside, basking in the faint pink glow emanating from the box.

DW: Danu, did you buy another pigfie?
Danu: Nope. This is a Portabello, made by the company Notpig. Pigfies are made by Oinks. Pigfies are just a kind of ABJP.
DW: ABJP?
Danu: Asian Ball-Jointed Pigs. That's what this kind of pig is called.

Danu: Isn't she beautiful?!

DW: Danu, that's the most horrible thing I've ever seen. It's eyes aren't the same size, and its mouth is crooked.
Danu: It's artistic. You just don't understand.
DW: Also, it's got wings.
Danu: It's an angel. Notpig makes supernatural pigs.
DW: Of course it does. Natural pigs are so passé.

Danu: Besides, it was such a great deal! It came with this carrying case for FREE. Look, there are even little velcro pockets on the side for the Notpig's accessories.
DW: Great deal? So, did you get a second job to cover the rent that you spent on that pigfie?
Danu: I told you. Pigfie isn't a generic term. It's an ABJP. And besides, I have the rent thing all worked out.
DW: Oh, yeah? Are you going to return your first pigfie?

Danu: Nope. I'm posting on Craigslist for a roommate!!

Dreyer: What did we learn today, Sjostrom? Let's recap!
Sjöström: Kids, pigfie isn't a generic term. The generic term is ABJP.
Dreyer: Unusual ABJP are "artistic," not "ugly" or "awful."
Sjöström: Natural pigs are passé!
Dreyer: And most importantly, when in doubt about buying a new ABJP, find a roommate on Craigslist!
Sjöström: I'm glad we know now.
Dreyer: Yep! Because knowing is half the battle!
Sjöström: Did we get fed this morning?
Dreyer: I don't know.

And here's Danu's Craigslist ad....

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